Day 2: Breakfast

     Good morning, campers.  Let's eat fish.

     Tsukiji Fish Market is the largest fish market in Tokyo and the earlier you get there, the better your chance of eating fish that had just made it to market. As in they just pulled it out of the water. Good deal, right? Here's the catch. In this case, "the earlier the better", means 4:30 in the morning. Yeah, buddy. Well, as a famous man once said, "If you're gonna do something, then quit fuckin' around and do it." The name eludes me for the moment. I'm pretty sure it was FDR though.  Anyway, to the market we go. 

    We awoke at 4 AM after our night of train-side beef and Japanese television (which is...glorious) and made our way out of the hotel to Tsukiji with directions from our helpful friends at the front desk, who speak English better then I do. These guys are pros. 

     

 

     This is the view from behind the front desk. Don't panic, the Japanese didn't steal the Eiffel Tower. That's the Tokyo Tower. This is again to reinforce how awesome our hotel is. You're probably wondering how we pay for all this glorious splendor.

     Cash. MONEY!!!

     

     Ka-BOOM!! Yeah-hah! That's like, $70 American, homey! BACK OFF DIS!! 

   

 

     After disgracing ourselves and the United States of America by waving $65 worth of yen in everyone's face, we walked to Tsukiji, where even at four in the morning, business was in full swing. We almost got clipped about 7 times by different vehicles, all carting fish and ice to 4 huge warehouses, all packed with row after row of vendors and fish. Remember, it's always a good idea to wander around a busy loading area after you've gotten 4 hours of sleep in the last 36. Always.

     

 

    Owing to how early it was, we were the first foreigners on the scene. As you can tell, the locals were riveted. Can't blame them. When you've got 50 pounds of octopus to clean and pack for the morning rush, you wouldn't be easily distracted either. And that's what the market is. Buckets and tanks and slabs and counters full to the brim with sea life, some of which is still wriggling, or just stopped. 

     Now, fair warning to all of you: The next couple pictures, for those of you that love seafood, will be spectacular. If you're indifferent to seafood, they will be merely interesting. If you hate seafood, these pictures will still probably be interesting, but in the same way a car accident is. There you are. Fair warning. Here come the fish.

  

    Octopus and sea snails at 4:45 in the morning? Yes and yes.

 

     You know you're food is fresh when it's still trying to escape. 

 

      Mmm. Dried...something.

 

     OK. I'm pretty sure these were just bugs.

 

     Somedays, you wake up with a water bottle on your head...

     

     Somedays, you wake up in a pan full of your own blood. Just how it shakes out sometimes.

  

     All the Cthulu you can eat. Anyone? Anyone? No. Fine. 

     

 

  

   Here. Just to show you that it wasn't all weird stuff. Just, you know, mostly weird stuff.

  

  

     Anyone order the fish THE SIZE OF A MAN?

 

     No, well how about THE SIZE OF A LADY?! AHHHHH!!

     The Tsukiji tuna auction. It takes place every morning and visitors are allowed to take pictures for one hour and that's it. One huge warehouse, big groups of men bidding on tuna for various purposes. Flash photography is forbidden, because it may distract the auctioneers from hand signals the bidders make. And if that happens, they harpoon you. Do not cross these people.

  

     Here's where we ate breakfast. Thank God it was good, because we just stood in front of the first place that had a line. We are very gullible when overseas. This place had a lot of rules, like no carry outs and no photos, which is unfortunate because I would have documented proof that I ate raw tuna, sea snails, uni, miso soup and coffee. And I would do it again. I don't know why it worked either. It just did.

      That's all for the Tsukiji trip. Here's two more pics that I think sum the place up.

     

 

      Yeah. Seems like a good place to leave off.